Dreams Really Do Come True???

I hope so. I know its possible. I have had so many "dreams come true."
Just not in the past 2.25 years.

I just don't know what has happened.

I'm not here to vent about it right now. It's just I don't know when I became so unhappy.
I know I must have been happy before.
And I know that I've had very happy moments in my life (especially at OCU), its just that I used to be able to take joyous things that happened to me and apply them to my everyday life. When did I lose the ability to do that?
When did I lose the capacity to look beyond the minimal, tangible, real life things, and stare towards my future. I've always taken each experience I've had, and tried to put it into context.
Now, that almost seems impossible.


Is that what maturity is? Is that what happens when you "grow up?"

I believe that there is joy, and that there is happiness in the world. I believe that there is a way of being incandescently happy and content. If not forever then at least for a day.

Do I always have to take happy events with a grain of salt? Can I ever just enjoy something without having to anticipate the negative?

I want to experience something fully, completely, without inhibitions.
I just don't know if I ever will again.